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GeneralZorpa on Yugioh
So I Don't Have The Stuff to Build DAD Return...
May 7, 2008

Sir Techsalot
Well I bet that a lot of you reading this don't have the cash to build the $1000+ Dark Armed Return Deck. The costs of Destiny Draw, Dark Armed Dragon, Darklord Zerato and Allure of Darkness are all through the roof. I know because I have tried to get them, and even on the Pojo boards where acrds are generally cheaper, Dark Armed Dragon won't sell for less than $180. Thus, using the power of my mind I have come up with some lower cost alternatives to swallowing the $600 cost of getting your playset of Dragons. I don't pretend that these suggestions will yield better results, people use the expensive stuff because it works, but it may get you high up on the ladder (top 24) of a Regional if you play your cards right.
Replacing the Draw Spells-Destiny Draw and Allure of Darkness
This is gonna be quite simple. You can't actually replace the Draw Spells of Destiny Draw and Allure of Darkness. They are the fastest and most reliable way to dig through your deck at the moment. However, there are some cards that will speed things up for you, at almost no cost as well as furthering your win condition. You listening? Good.
Magical Merchant-And now at least 100 people that read this are gonna think "Geez, a slow flip effect to replace the amazing goodliness that are draw spells, GZ must have gone senile!" Now are we all over that initial thought? All right. Magical Merchant is worth it. Without Card Trooper, this is the best way to get large amounts of monsters into the graveyard and it nets you a spell or trap in the process. You dump off 3-4 monsters with this guy, and if they are all Dark types, then you are in business. Then you can start massacring your opponent with all of those remove from play effects and then Return. DAD Return decks focus on the use of Armageddon Knight to get their Dark monsters into the graveyard, and people often played Goe Goe the Gallant Ninja just because the Armageddon Knight play is the most common that DAD uses. However, you set this guy first turn instead, you get to dig through your deck AND get a Spell or Trap to continue the carnage.
Reasoning and Monster Gate-these are the original purveyors of speed. Reasoning still sees play, both in Diamond Dude Turbo and Six Samurai decks, and Monster Gate does as well. These guys are kinda the opposite of Merchant. You lose Spell and Traps in order to get a monster on the field. However,I successfully piloted a Dark Armed Return Deck that used Monster Gate and Reasoning at a local Regional, going 5 wins/3 losses. I will say that I mostly lost to misplays on my part. However, randomizing the levels of monsters in your deck gives you an almost guaranteed chance to get a monster to the field. I find that Darknight Parshath, apart from being great Armageddon Knight fodder, is rather painful when summoned with Reasoning. Level 5 is never called, and his ATK boost and draw power have made many an opponent groan in pain. Fusilier Dragon the Dual Mode Beast is also excellent for this. He will NEVER be a dead card. You can summon him for half the attack, or get him Special Summoned By Reasoning with 2800. These two are also great as Parshath regulates the grave and Fusilier is another huge beater for Return from the Different Dimension.
Themed Recruiter Monsters-well I am absolutly dumbfounded at the lack of attention that 2 of the best recruiter monsters ever printed are getting. Shien's Footsoldier and Test Ape are amazing, even though they have low stats. Nobody doubted Card Trooper because he returned to 400 next turn. Shien's Spy can search out ANY level 3 or lower Samurai, Meaning Yaichi, Kamon,  and Yariza are all easy to get to. Often getting that one more Samurai to the field is more important than life points. And Test Ape is even better. He gets any Gladiator level 4 or lower, which are generally the only ones played anyhow. I have done broken plays like My opponent has Armageddon Knight and Return Set. I summon Rescue Cat. I tribute Rescue Cat for two test Ape. I suicide said apes into the Knight, netting me 1400 damage, and two Gladiator Beast Laquari (or one Darius if a Gladiator is in the graveyard). I beat face, and have only lost one card, and have 400 lp onmy opponent, and then switch out for Bestari to destroy the facedown, or keep them all if I brought out Darius, and then get Heraklinos JUST FOR SUMMONING RESCUE CAT!!! of course Recruiters speed up your deck by thinning it as well as maintaining field presence.
Replacing the Heavy Hitters
There is no replacement for Dark Armed Dragon, Dark Magician of Chaos, and Darklord Zerato, but there are a few monsters out there that are up to the challenge.
The End of Anubis-This guy is a Dark Armed player's worst Nightmare. Suddenly all of their graveyard tricks are gone, and they only have a few outs to remove him. I fell to just ONE of these guys randomly maindecked by a player new to the game. He is fast, Special Summonable, and has High attack strength. The only reason he is not played is because he locks down your graveyard as well. So What? Your opponent will be wasting their resources to destroy Anubis, so just let him be a magnet for Lightning Vortex, and then blast them next turn with those revival spells you have been saving up, while they are still reeling from the damage.
Dark Nepthys-Whoo Hoo, she is good. She can Be Special Summoned when there are more than 3 monsters in the grave, has 2400 ATK and regulates the graveyard AND destroys a spell or trap when she is Special Summoned, by anything. She is a suitable replacement for Dark Armed Dragon, but you need to back her up. An aggro opponent will quickly run her over with their superior ATK of 2800 on their big guys. Extra copies of Lightning Vortex and some defensive traps should go a long way towards preserving your Nepthys. And if she does fall, just revive her or use her as DARK fodder for another Nepthys.
Blowback Dragon-Hehehe, this guy is cool. He has 2300, which is ok, but more importantly he is one tribute, which makes him faster than Darklord (most of the time). Plus he can destroy ANY card on the field, not just monsters, for FREE. He does not have the field clearing Benefits of Darklord, but is far more versatile in the face of adversity. Because he is a DARK machine, you can even do cool things with DD Scout Plane, Jinzo and Chimeratech Overdragon. Trust me, the deck is not as fast as DAD Return,but way more explosive.
Replacing Crush Card Virus
I have a whole section devoted to this card because it is that good. It is almost impossible to replace, and just as impossible to acquire. But there are a few traps that do sort of the same thing, and I'll outline them here.
Trap Dustshoot + Mind Crush-Even though this is limited, it can still devastate a hand. You get the look at the hand that Crush gives, and you get to choose any Monster to go back to the deck, arguably better than sending it to the graveyard. Plus you do not have to have a weak monster on the field to activate it. The same goes for Mind Crush. Crush-Shoot is an immensely powerful play, often devastating a hand MORE than Crush Card Virus. Plus they are commons, allowing easy access, both in reprint sets and the original sets.
Well, there is no clear way to replace the cards in the Dark Return deck, but these ideas should help you get on your way. There are many more cards that you can use, I just chose the most effective ones that are more mainstream. If you wanna chat, flame or suggest ideas, please email me at raptor1k@hotmail.com I love getting ideas , as well as decks, so email me of you have anything you want to say.
Coming Soon-Create-A-Card contest Results!!!!
Thanks for Reading!



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