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By Spooks

    January 16, 2004  .... It happens all the time.  You buy your packet of Mirrodin, at the recently upped price from $5 to $6, (this is assuming you live in Australia.  You might want to say something if your paying these prices in America) and you slowly flip through your commons.  "Yes, my fourth Raise the alarm.  I can make my Soldier Sceptre deck now".  You get to the uncommons.  "Alright, Lightenign Greaves" Your feeling pretty lucky as you get to the rare......
    "WTF!!?!?!  MESMERIC ORB??!?"
    Then you storm out of the shop and quit Magic and grow up to be popular and famous.  'Sif you want that right?  So, allow me, Spooks, to show you how to make a fun deck with your janky card you just opened.  I cannot guarantee it will win.  In fact, I can almost promise you it will lose a lot, but it is sure to annoy the person sitting across from you.
    Now, when tackling Janky cards, the best approach is to think about what it does thats bad, and try and make it good for you.  Overall, it isnt a bad card.  It mills your opponent as well.  Another way togo about it, is to see if you can get AROUND the drawback.  This one is easy.  Yotian Soldier has been brought back.  Serra Angel has alwys been with us.  we got Leonin Den Guard, and about a billion pieces of worthy equipment (slight exageration).  Then throw in a Millstone, and your already in a better position than your opponent.  But god, that is so boring.
    Decks liek this never make your opponent go "Wow, that's pretty clever" and for me, that's what magic is about.  So I will tell you the concept of the deck I am working on. 
    "Untap.  Put the top 6 cards of my library into my graveyard.  Bye bye Visara, swamp, mountain, Rorix, Symboitic Wurm, Doomed Necromancer.  First main phase.  Zombify Rorix. Attack phase, swing for 6 through the air"
    Yes, ladies and gentlemen, presenting Mesmeric Orb reanimator.  This little baby slices, it dices and it even grooms the family dog.  Drawback?  What drawback?  There is none.  It fills your graveyard with yummy reanimation targets, and it takes away answers from your opponents deck.  Here is a rough decklist that I am still working on. 
Zombifying Orb
14 swamps
4 Vault of Whispers
4 Mountains
2 Bloodstained Mire
(24 Lands)
1 Nim Devourer
2 Akroma, Angel of Wrath
1 Rorix Bladewing
2 Scion of Darkness
2 Symbiotic Wurm
1 Platnium Angel
1 Plated Slagwurm
2 Undead Gladiator
4 Doomed Necromancer
2 Dreamborn Muse (just for kicks)
(18 Zombify Targets)
2 Chrome Mox
4 Zombify
4 Betrayal of Flesh
2 Terror
4 Mesmeric Orb
4 Diabolic Tutor
4 Blackmail
2 Oversold Cemetry
2 Infest
(28 Helpful ways to get your creatures into play)
    *pauses as you double check my math* Yes, that is 70 cards.  I haven't play tested this deck, but I am pretty afraid that against control, you will deck yourself before they do.  So, you come prepared for it.  I'll quickly run through the spells, and a few of the creatures that need a bit of explainign.
Dreamborn Muse - I love to irritate my opponents.  I love it.  This is there purely for that reason. 
Platnium Angel - As I said, I was worried about decking myself.
Nim Devourer - with only 6 artifacts.  He is there simply for the symbiotic wurm (which I worry will deck me :S)
Chrome Mox - As with all reanimator decks, your screwed unless you get a fast start.  These up the chances of a fast start.
Zombify - If you don't know why I am playing these, you don't get the concept of this deck.
Betrayal of Flesh - REALLLLY expensive.  But it is more recursion in a format that has little recursion.  Also, if you want to lose some lands, it removes a creature. (good Karma tech.)
Terror - In case you get slow starts.  The other two are in the sideboard.
Mesmeric Orb - *cough*
Diabolic Tutor - your playing 70 cards.  You need these to get the ones you want.
Blackmail -  ever played reanimator before?  Know how annoying it is to have your opening hand filled with recursion, and lands...and 2 Akroma's?
Oversold Cemetry - re-usable Necromancers
Infest - Maindeck Goblin hate.  'Sif you wouldn't
    As I said, I cant promise you will be on table 1 with this at FNM (unless you play with 2 ppl at FNM) but it will make think your clever, and itwill frustrate the hell out of aggro players, because they tap alot.  ANd it will frustrate the hell out of control players, because they tap alot to draw cards to gain control.  And combo players...well, combo players are always annoyed because thier combo never works.  Fools.  MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHA...oh..wait...bugger.
    If you try this deck, let me know how you went.  I will be trying ti soon as I get the cards needed, and tweak it some more.  Tell me what changes you made, how many people said that your clever, and how many people kept looking at their tapped permanents, at thier library, and back to teh tapped permanents, then at your orb, then at your grinning face, and then sneered at you as they pass the turn.  Good luck, and until next time...I'll see you next time.
    *Cue theme music for BREAK THAT JANK*
(Special shout out to my friend Stephen who helped me muchly with the deck)

Copyright 2001


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