The End Of The Squirrels As We Know It...

Vintage Stock Broken Arrow, Oklahoma March 15, 2003 40 People $5
Winner - 5 booster packs 2nd - 3 booster packs 3rd - 1 booster pack
Top Deck Games Tulsa, Oklahoma March 15, 2003 60 People $3
Winner - 2 booster packs 2nd - 2 booster packs
Wizard's Asylum Tulsa, Oklahoma March 16, 2003 ?? People $3
Winner - 5 booster packs 2nd - 3 booster packs 3rd - 2 booster packs

Hey, hey , hey, Pojo people! It's another exciting installment of Spooky's Squirrels. Actually, the exciting part isn't really accurate. But it is indeed another installment. In addition, this report will cover not one, but THREE tournaments that I attended this weekend. But, given the fact that I didn't do all that hot in them, there won't be much to say about some of them.,

First things first. I want to issue an apology to Sammy (from last week's report). I called him a bad sport, but that really wasn't fair. Sammy and I corresponded over e-mail and he explained to me that he wasn't trying to cop an attitude - he was just being really serious for the duel. So, I am sorry about that Sammy. Ryan, on the other hand, still remains in the "Bad Attitude" category in my book...

Next thing - you may notice the title: "The End Of The Squirrels As We Know It..." In addition to being a reference to a well known song by REM, it's also an indication that this will be the last weekend that I will be using "Attack of the Killer Squirrels" as my deck. "Why?" you may ask. Well, I've found that I've pretty much uncovered all the possible permutations available with this deck, and that, with the exception of the occasional game where one of the duelists get a lucky draw (see below), most of my duels are pretty much the same. So, I'm going to try to keep the game fresh for myself by using a new deck next week. And, once I round up all of the cards that I need from LON and the new starter decks, I will be building a deck centered around the "Fire Princess" card. That deck should be something else! Maybe not a GOOD something else, but unique to say the least.

Finally, to all of you people who post tournament reports on Pojo.com: ENOUGH WITH THE IDIOCY!!! You may wonder what I mean by idiocy. Well, if you are unable to post a report that:

1) Doesn't degrade other people's playing ability or their decks;
2) Keeps the bragging about your own deck and playing ability to a minimum;
3) Doesn't have whining (about cheating, adults playing the game, etc.) as it's main focus; and,
4) Is somewhat articulate. For crying out loud, if you don't know how to spell a word like "Ultimate" or "Premature", use Spell Check of grab a dictionary (that's the big book with all of those words and definitions that's gathering dust over in your book case).

Most of the reports out there are wonderful and don't need any changes whatsoever. But there are a few out there that really need to be edited or just plain eliminated.

And before you criticize me for whining about stealing, let me just say that it ain't whining if it's the truth. In other words, when you read my rants about thieves saying that they are the lowest form of existence; that if they are given a billion years, they might make it far enough up the evolutionary ladder to be classified as "SCUM"; that the reason that they steal cards is because they are too lazy, worthless, pathetic, and stupid to go out and get a job so they could buy their own cards; and that instead of burning thieves in effigy, we should just set the actual crooks themselves on fire; well... that's not whining - that's a fact!

One other thing - to all you thieves out there: April is Thief Appreciation Month. That's when we - the honest duelers in the world - take time out of our busy schedules to show you pilfering wussies what we really think about you. Personally, I've prepared a nice little "gift" for all of you criminals out there. So, if you're a card-stealing slimesucker, then drop me an e-mail sometime before the beginning of April. And I'll send you, absolutely free, a little fragrance I like to call "Ebola". You can spray some on just before you head off to that big tournament to steal some poor kid's cards. It won't make you smell any better (and, man, you do stink), but it'll clean out your insides... literally. Just think of it as my way of saying to you, "You deserve to have internal organ failure!"

Alrighty then... enough thief bashing. Onto the deck!!!

Attack of the Killer Squirrels!!! (40 cards total)

Monsters (20)
Cyber Jar
Gearfried the Iron Knight X2
Goblin Attack Force X2
Jinzo
Magician of Faith X2
Man-Eater Bug X2
Nimble Momonga X3 (Killer Squirrels!!!)
Sangan X2
Summoned Skull
Trap Master
Wall of Illusion X2
Witch of the Black Forest

Magic (12)
Bait Doll
Change of Heart
Dark Hole
Fissure
Heavy Storm
Monster Reborn
Nobleman of Crossout
Pot of Greed
Premature Burial
Raigeki
Snatch Steal
Swords of Revealing Light

Traps (8)
Call of the Haunted
Dust Tornado
Imperial Order
Mirror Force
Seven Tools of the Bandit
Skull Lair
Trap Hole
Waboku

Those loyal fans of the Killer Squirrels out there (all three of you) may notice an addition to my deck... I finally got Jinzo!!! I personally believed that I would be unbeatable once I had Jinzo in my deck. Well, they say that pride goeth before the fall, and they weren't wrong...

But it's still pretty cool that I got my Jinzo!

Saturday 10:00 AM - VINTAGE STOCK

In some ways, this tournament is my favorite tournament of the weekend: it's an official tournament, the employees at Vintage Stock are nice, and I get along with pretty much all of the duelists there. However, the tournament is STILL a single-duel, single-elimination tournament (i.e. you lose, you're out!) I would almost offer to host the tournament myself if I could get it changed to match play (best 2 out of 3). Almost.

First Duel - BigSpooky vs. John & Isaac (Machine)

I'm getting right to the dueling in this tournament because, frankly, I'm planning on keeping this report as short as my tournament was. Now John (an adult like me) is a great duelist. He and his son, Isaac, play together (with his son sitting on his lap), so I was up against double the brain power. But aside from the fact that his (their?) dueling skills are considerable, one word can sum up this duel for John... LUCKY!!!

John got, quite possibly, the luckiest draw in the history of Yu-Gi-Oh! While I got one of the worst. Here's a summary of the action:
1st turn (John) - Place 1 magic/trap and one card in facedown defensive mode.
1st turn (BigSpooky) - Place Dust Tornado and Killer Squirrel face down.
2nd turn (John) - Flip Cyber Jar. John draws 4 monsters (all machines) to my 2 (Magician of Faith and Trap Master). John plays Raigeki, then Limiter Removal. And that's the duel.

Final Score: 0-8000

Quick, wasn't it? After the duel, I congratulated John (and Isaac) and wished them luck in the rest of the tourney. I wasn't bitter about losing that quickly... it's just the way the game goes sometimes. But lady luck would grace me with her services later in the day...

One funny note: there were four adults entered in this tournament (myself, Lance, John, and a gentleman named Ian who enters with his son). Well, thanks to John, I went out in the first round. Lance - the #1 or #2 duelist in Oklahoma depending on which set of rankings you look at - also went out in the first round due to an Exodia deck. Finally, a tough guy named Alex knocked both John and Ian out of the tournament in the second and third rounds, respectively. So, to all you bratpunks who whine about adults playing the game, take notice: we are just as easy to beat as every other player!

After my remarkably short tournament play, I decided to partake in a few duels for fun. First, I played against Lance and his new deck destruction deck. Then, I partook in a challenge duel against Alex (the same kid who pummeled John and Ian) because he claimed that his Thousand Eyes Restrict deck could beat my Squirrels (you can read all about Alex's tournament experience at)

http://www.pojo.com/yu-gi-oh/KillerDecks/March2003/KDR-17/restrictdeck%20%20Alex%20%20%20Broken%20Arrow%20Oklahoma%20%20%20%20Vintage%20stock%20%203-15-03.htm ;

and a vengeance duel against Colton (who whooped me for first place last week). There was the same bet for each duel: whenever the winner said "Who's your daddy?" to the loser, the loser had to respond "You, daddy!" I won't go into great detail about the duels, but I will say one thing:

Alex... Colton... Who's your daddy? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

I guess Alex and Colton really did have the last laugh, though. Alex took third in the tournament and Colton (after a hard fought duel where he narrowly edged out my boy CJ) took first... AGAIN! (you can read all about CJ's tournament experience at)

http://www.pojo.com/yu-gi-oh/KillerDecks/March2003/KDR-17/Tourney%20report%20BA%20oklahoma.htm

Well, Colton, I have to concede: you ARE a great duelist. However... who's your daddy? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Last laugh to Spooky!

Saturday 2:30 PM - Top Deck Games

Well, the Killer Squirrels had kind of let me down in the last tournament. Of course, I don't think ANY deck (except for maybe a deck full of Wabokus) could have handled that onslaught. So, I went into the Top Deck tournament with aspirations of a much better performance. And, while my hopes were somewhat realized, again my Squirrels fell a bit short.

Just as last week, this tournament is three-round match play with the top four duelists moving on to the semifinals (you pretty much have to be undefeated to get there).

First round - BigSpooky vs. Evan (Newbie)

Evan was fairly nice little guy who was somewhat new to the game. But, unlike a lot of kids that have to duel adults, Evan was polite and complimentary - even after he lost (take a cue from Evan, kids!)

Duel 1 - Didn't last too long. Evan did 650 when he attacked my Sangan with his Guardian of the Throne. However, that allowed me to pull my Cyber Jar, which cleared the field and blessed me with two monsters while leaving Evan monsterless. After a tribute for Jinzo on the next turn, the game was mine.

Final Score: 7350-0

Duel 2 - Not too much different here. Even did hit me for 300 damage early on (though I don't remember how). But my Man-Eater Bug was on the field, so I quickly took a quiz (see my last tournament report if you don't get the reference), flipped the Man-Eater Bug, and tributed for Summoned Skull. And that was all she wrote...

Final Score: 7700-0

After the duel, I complimented Evan's dad on having a well brought up son. He told me that he had taught him how to be gracious in both defeat and victory. I must say that, while I admire anyone with the ability to beat me, I admire people (especially kids) who are good sports far more. Some of you whiny bratpunks should take a cue from Evan...

Second Round - BigSpooky vs. Jeff (Balanced Beatdown)

Yes... this guy is the only person to ever have defeated Killer Squirrels in two straight duels in match play. He also made it into the winner's bracket of the second round in this tournament by defeating Jesse (#1 or #2 in Oklahoma... depending on which set of rankings you look at) in two straight duels. He is definitely good. Plus, he was pretty well stocked on all of the new LON cards as well as owning each of the new starter decks ("Aw, man! Penguin Soldier! [Groan!]")

Duel 1 - Jeff hit me early with his Jinzo for 2400 direct damage. Fortunately, I had my Fissure and Monster Reborn in my hand, and was able to use his own monster against him. While managing to destroy my pilfered Jinzo, Jeff was unable to stop my amassing an army on my side of the field. With a monster removal card of my own (Raigeki... gotta love it!), I was able to hit Jeff directly for heavy damage and win the duel in a few turns.

Final Score: 5600-0

Duel 2 - Jeff again started out strong by plastering me early by blowing my monsters on the field away with his Penguin Soldier then attacking with it and La Jinn. However, I managed to sneak a Killer Squirrel onto the field, which Jeff promptly destroyed (as well as the two that I special summoned from my deck). After a few monster removal tactics on my part, Jeff managed to get his Summoned Skull on the field. However, a well timed Snatch Steal tilted the balance back towards me. I was able to summon my Jinzo onto the field and steal his Summoned Skull. Fortunately, he wasn't able to get a card that could get rid of these two behemoths, and I finished him off in two turns.

Final Score: 4650-0

So the Killer Squirrels get vengeance against the second person to have beaten me last week. The remaining question is whether or not I would be able to ride this high into the third round and make my way into the semifinals.

Third Round - BigSpooky vs. Jeremiah (Balanced Beatdown)

I probably should've taken Jeremiah more seriously in this match. As you have read, I do have a tendency to take kids for granted after I've beaten a particularly good adult. But I think that I played pretty well in this duel, so maybe I'm starting to get over that...

Duel 1 - This duel was never close. Jeremiah made the grave mistake of attacking a Squirrel in attack mode with La Jinn. After he attacked another facedown Squirrel, I cleared the field and hit him with everything I had. In two turns, I had four monsters on the field to his none, and was hitting him for heavy damage each time.

Final Score: 9200-0

Note: In this duel, Jeremiah tried to mount some offense by playing Call of the Haunted. However, he tried to activate the trap during the same turn he set it. I called him on it in this duel. But the fact that he did this will be important later on...

Duel 2 - This duel started out as a blowout for Jeremiah. He kept clearing the field and, within three turns, had me dangling at 800 life points. Somehow, I managed to clear the field and strike back to bring Jeremiah to 2400 life points. Unfortunately, I made a fatal mistake when I flipped my Mask of Darkness to retrieve my Call of the Haunted. Jeremiah capitalized by playing La Jinn and attacking my Mask of Darkness. Oops!

Final Score: 0-2400

Duel 3 - This duel never went really well for me. Jeremiah got La Jinn on the open field with two Axes and a Black Pendant to hit me for 4300 damage. I had an Imperial Order down, but I held off on playing it to try to lure him into playing a magic card next turn. I set a Sangan. Next turn, he set a magic/trap, summoned a Harpie's Brother, then attacked my Sangan. After I drew my Cyber Jar, Jeremiah attacked directly with his pumped-up La Jinn. In an effort to save the duel, I flipped my Imperial Order to negate the Axes and Pendant. Jeremiah countered with Solemn Judgment... which was the card that he placed on that turn! Unfortunately, I failed to notice it and declared him the winner.

Final Score: 0-2300

I have to be honest about this - I cried wolf after the duel. Jeremiah technically didn't win the match since he misplayed a card. But I was already packing up my cards when I realized it. I should have been a bigger man and let it go, but I felt that I had to tell Jeremiah that even though he won the duel, he didn't really win the duel. I was wrong and I apologize to Jeremiah. Regardless of the what happened, I need to learn to take the high road and be graceful in defeat.

So, with a loss in the third round, I was out of contention for the tournament. Probably a good thing, though, as I was late for dinner with my folks.

Sunday 12:30 PM - Wizard's Asylum

What a beautiful Sunday afternoon! The sky was slightly overcast, the temperature was in the upper 60's, and all the plants in the area were starting to bloom. Perfect weather for Squirrels.

I headed out to my final tournament of the weekend with one goal in mind: to take first place in my deck's final tournament. No easy task, since the Wizard's Asylum tournament has a lot of strong players - young and old alike. And, since the tournament was bracketed according to age, I would have to face the older players first - players with enough resources to get the best cards available, and enough savvy to use them to their fullest extent.

Much like the Top Deck tournament, this tourney has three rounds with the top sixteen duelists moving on to the octofinals. The nice thing about this tourney is that it's much easier to qualify for the elimination rounds. On the other hand, with four elimination matches instead of two, it's also more difficult to get to the finals.

Jesse, the aforementioned card god, was also at this tournament. If I could face and defeat him, it would mean that I had defeated all of the players who had beaten me the week before.

First Round - BigSpooky vs. Andy (Lord of Dragons)

Andy had built himself a respectable dragon deck, but really hadn't been playing the game long enough to get all of the pieces he needed (By the way Andy, if you're reading this, I just got another Lord of Dragons and Flute of Summoning Dragon that I'd be happy to give to you to round out your deck).

Duel 1 - I'm usually pretty forthright when I play well, when I play poorly, and when I'm just lucky. This duel was one of those times. I drew Raigeki and Change of Heart in my opening hand. So, after he played a card facedown, I played Change of Heart and tributed it for Summoned Skull to hit Andy for 2500. Next turn, I played Raigeki, set Magician of Faith, and attacked again with Summoned Skull. Finally, I flipped my Magician, got back Change of Heart, and attacked him for the win.

Final Score: 8000-0

Duel 2 - Almost exactly the same as the first, with a slight variation on cards. Put simply: I had the luck of the draw in both duels. Andy had none.

Final Score: 8000-0

Andy was disappointed about losing, but gracious nonetheless. We talked about his deck a bit, then we reported the match.

Funny little tidbit here: After the duel, I was challenged by Vance. Vance can be a nice kid at times, but I fear that he's well on his way to bratpunkdom. Anyhow, I drew a somewhat decent hand and thumped him pretty hard, only taking damage to my Premature Burial. About eight turns into the duel, it was 7200-1900. I had 3 monsters on the field, he had none. He was about to start his turn when they announced the start of the second round. Vance showed me the pieces of his Black Skull Dragon in his hand, stating, "Once I got that out, you were pretty much dead." Unlike in my duel with Jeremiah, I managed to restrain myself. I just nodded, smiled, and said, "If you say so."

I didn't bother showing him the Change of Heart in my hand...

... or my Mirror Force on the field...

... or my facedown Man-Eater Bug...

;)

Second Round - BigSpooky vs. John & Isaac (Machine)

Yep. Same John and Isaac that whooped me at Vintage Stock nary a day before. While I feared that I might meet an untimely demise as I had one day hence, I was also looking forward to the possibility of early revenge for my Squirrels. Here's to hoping that lightning (aka Raigeki) didn't strike twice in the same place.

Duel 1 - This duel started out poorly for me with them taking an early lead thanks to a Jinzo #7 equipped with an Axe and 7 Completed. I managed to Snatch Steal it next turn, but it didn't last thanks to John's Heavy Storm. However, that did eliminate the Axe and 7 Completed, so I only had to contend with losing 500 points a turn. After summoning another Jinzo #7, John was able to cut me down to 1350 life points. However, fate ironically reversed itself as my Cyber Jar saved me. After a wonderful draw (including Jinzo) I was able to put John to the screws, quickly draining his life points to nothing.

Final Score: 1350-0

Duel 2 - John and Isaac tragically ran afoul of some Killer Squirrels in this match. They managed to negate any damage that was done, and gave me the opening needed to get my Summoned Skull on the field. With a few lucky draws and a few direct attacks, my Dust Tornado blew away his last card on the field (Magic Cylinder... !!!) and my army invaded.

Final Score: 8100-0

Much like I had tried to be the day before, John was a good sport in defeat. Isaac, however, reminded me how they had soundly thrashed me the day before. Thanks Isaac!

Third Round - BigSpooky vs. Jesse/CardDestroyer (Card Destruction Beatdown)

I probably shouldn't call his deck a card destruction deck, since he didn't play Card Destruction on me in any of our duels. Maybe he took it out of his deck. Weird!

This was it! My final vindication duel! If I beat Jesse, not only would I be guaranteed a spot in the elimination rounds, but I would also exact revenge for last week's defeat. Here we go!

Duel 1 - Jesse started out strong by getting his Jinzo on the field and attacking for direct damage. Unfortunately for him, that was the only thing that went well for him. I Fissured his Jinzo, then played Monster Reborn to bring him back to my side of the field. After I got my Summoned Skull out to join him, it was all downhill for Jesse. He did manage to delay me with a couple of Ekibyo Drakmords (I hate that card!), but my Heavy Storm made short work of them.

Final Score: 5600-0

Duel 2 - If the first duel went all my way, then this duel was all Jesse's. He hit me early for 4000 direct damage. I tried to counter with my Cyber Jar, but his Solemn Judgment stopped that. That turned out to be the only damage he would take.

Final Score: 0-4000

Duel 3 - Jesse's accursed Ekibyo Drakmords could have gotten the better of me in this duel (since I didn't draw my Heavy Storm). However, I decided to throw caution to the wind and Dark Hole my infected Jinzo. Turned out to be a successful ploy as Jesse lost both of his Ekibyo Drakmords to my gambit. I, on the other hand, thanks to my Call of the Haunted, managed to procure an uninfected Jinzo... and the victory!

Final Score: 5700-0

Jesse was a lot more gracious in defeat this time than the last time I beat him. I shook his hand and told him that I hoped to see him in the finals. Unfortunately, it didn't happen that way...

Octofinals: BigSpooky vs. Jesse/CardDestroyer (Card Destruction Beatdown)

No... this is NOT a misprint. I got paired up against Jesse AGAIN! So everything that happened in the last round was for naught. I figured that I had used up all of my good karma in my last match against Jesse. It was going to take a miracle to beat him again... a Squirrel shaped miracle.

Duel 1 - This duel ran very close as Jesse and I both took massive damage throughout the duel. He started out strong with a direct attack to my life points from his 7 Colored Fish. But, as the scales inexorably tilted back and forth, I managed to gain the upper hand with my Summoned Skull. Thanks to the welcome addition of Gearfried and a Dust Tornado (to remove Jesse's %@%@! Ekibyo Drakmord on my Summoned Skull), I took the match.

Final Score: 2100-0

Duel 2 - Not much to say about this duel. Apart from a few random hits by my Killer Squirrels, Jesse made me cry like a little bratpunk in this one, finishing me off in three turns. He was still summoning monsters on the field when I pointed out to him that the three that he had would more than finish me off.

Final Score: 0-6000

Duel 3 - This was it... this was for all the marbles! Winner goes on to the quarterfinals... loser just goes. But I am happy to say that, in this duel, SQUIRRELS REIGNED SUPREME!!! Jesse attacked a facedown Squirrel early on, and never recovered from there. He did manage to block my Raigeki with his Solemn Judgment, but at the cost of 3000 life points. He used the monster that he saved from Raigeki to summon Jinzo. Unfortunately, his own monster led to his demise as I played Snatch Steal to hit him for 2400, then let my Killer Squirrel finish the job.

Final Score: 7600-0

Here lies CardDestroyer - felled by a Squirrel.

Seriously, Jesse played very well and will certainly get a prop from me. He stuck around to watch the remainder of the duels and even cheered me on a time or two. I take back all of the mean things I ever said about Jesse just for that alone.

Besides, this won't be the last duel that Jesse and I have. I look forward to him thrashing me soundly in the future.

Quarterfinals - BigSpooky vs. Ryan (Balanced Beatdown)

For those of you keeping score at home, this is the Ryan that I dueled in the finals at Top Deck last week. You know... the one who Mike told me to kick his... yeah, you get the drift. Needless to say, after the thrashing I gave him last week at Top Deck, Ryan was not happy about having to face me next (you'd rather face Jesse?) Poor guy!

Duel 1 - I'm not going to go into great detail about this duel except for one funny moment: Ryan played his wacky Painful Choice combo where he pulled five of his best cards. I let him have Monster Reborn. So, after beating him down to about 4900, Ryan tried to preserve his life points with his Monster Reborn...

Ryan needs to watch out for Imperial Order from now on.

Final Score: 8000-0

Duel 2 - This duel was much closer as Ryan and I traded damage early on. My Killer Squirrels helped allay some of the damage, but eventually fell prey to Ryan's Dark Hole. But my Cyber Jar came through, delivering two monsters and Jinzo, while leaving Ryan high and dry. And that was the ballgame!

Final Score: 5400-0

Ryan was a much better sport this time around, so no slops to him this week. He still wasn't happy about losing to me, though. I'm not sure what it is about my deck that stumps Ryan. He has a good deck and he's a good duelist. I guess Squirrel Power is more potent than anyone knew...

Semifinals - BigSpooky vs. Dat (Heavy Beatdown)

Because the entire tournament is bracketed according to age, I started hitting the younger duelists later on. Of course, these guys also had decks that must have cost several hundred dollars. Dat's, for example, had a bunch of the hard-to-find cards from the Labyrinth of Nightmare set - two Torrential Tributes, a Gemini Elf, and a United We Stand - in addition to all of the big cards from the previous expansions. But he didn't have any Squirrels...

Duel 1 - I don't think Dat had ever run into Killer Squirrels before, because he attacked them with a passion. Fortunately, his aggressiveness opened the way for me to get my Summoned Skull on the field and rip Dat apart. Torrential Tribute threw my gameplan off a bit near the end of the duel, but Monster Reborn brought it right back in line.

Final Score: 7200-0

Duel 2 - I have often said that all of the skill in the world won't help you if your opponent draws the right cards (see Vintage Stock tournament report above). This duel was a perfect example. Dat had Raigeki and Nobleman of Crossout in his opening hand. Unable to put up any kind of defense, Dat crushed me in three turns, only taking damage from his Premature Burial.

Final Score: 0-7200

I managed to give Dat an early lead by Snatch Stealing his Gemini Elf and giving him 1000 life points for a few turns. But it didn't last long as his own Elf and two of my Squirrels tore into Dat's life points. Unable to defend against an ever increasing army, Dat fell a few turns later.

Final Score: 7000-0

So I've made it to the final round. I was facing an extremely strong twelve-year old (I think... apologies if I got it wrong) named Dylan. He offered me a draw so that we could split first and second prize equally. On any other day, I might have been tempted. But, since this was going to be my Killer Squirrel deck's swan song, I refused the offer and told him to get his deck ready.

Finals - BigSpooky vs. Dylan (Heavy Beatdown)

Let me just preface this by saying that Dylan is a good duelist - you can't get to the finals in a tournament this big without being good. On that note, however, I just want to say that Dylan's deck makes Dat's look like a starter. Dylan (or, in all probability, Dylan's father) must have spent well over a thousand dollars constructing his deck. It had Gemini Elves, Torrential Tributes, Kycoo the Ghost Destroyers, United We Stands, Magic Cylinders, as well as all of the great cards that I have in my deck.

All except for Killer Squirrels, that is.

Duel 1 - Dylan, like Dat, was unaware of the hidden power of my Killer Squirrels. He attacked one facedown for his first move of the match, allowing me to get my other two onto the field rather quickly. Squirrel Power rocked his world as I tributed one of my Squirrels for Jinzo (which he destroyed with Torrential Tribute... more on that in a second). But, Call of the Haunted got my Jinzo back in the action and, after getting Summoned Skull onto the field, I devastated Dylan's remaining life points.

Final Score: 7600-0

About the Jinzo/Torrential Tribute debacle - when he activated Torrential Tribute upon my Jinzo summoning, I informed him that Torrential Tribute would not work with Jinzo on the field, and that he would be wasting the card (I was going to let him take it back). However, the store owner (who was watching the duel along with a crowd of about 20) sided with Dylan and made me bury my Jinzo (Grrrrr...) Since then I have discovered the following information about Torrential Tribute:

1) When chained with a flip-summoned monster, it does NOT negate a flip effect (read that carefully, Jesse);
2) You cannot activate when Jinzo is summoned.

Those rulings are both directly from the Upper Deck official card rulings. I had it with me at the time, but didn't bother to check. My bad. Doesn't matter though... I still won the duel.

Duel 2 - Card for card, almost the exact same second duel that I had with Dat last round. Only difference: Dylan didn't use Premature Burial.

Final Score: 0-8000

Duel 3 - For the first ten turns, a very close duel. The tide turned, however, when I flipped my Cyber Jar. I got three monsters and Imperial Order; Dylan got one monster and Raigeki. After hitting Dylan's life points for damage, Dylan attempted to avoid defeat by playing Raigeki... forgetting that my Imperial Order was now on the field. That mistake cost him the duel... and the tournament.

Final Score: 4800-0

So Spooky's Squirrels win their farewell tournament by going 7-0 (14-4 in duels). Not a bad way to go. Plus, I managed to beat every player who squashed me last weekend, so my thirst for vengeance is nearly satisfied. Now I just need to build a deck that can beat Jeremiah next weekend...

Props:
Attack of the Killer Squirrels - my faithful deck... may you have a happy retirement.

Lance - for helping me originally build Killer Squirrels

Sammy - for being cool even though I wasn't very nice to you in my tournament report last week

John & Isaac - for beating me worse than anyone has ever beaten me

Jeremiah - for pulling out a victory against me in the Top Deck tournament

Jesse - for good sportsmanship after our duels

CJ - for winning second place in the Vintage Stock tournament

All of the duelists that I faced - no complaints... you were all great!

Vintage Stock, Top Deck, and Wizard's Asylum - for hosting the tournaments

Slops:
Me - for being a bad sport after my duel against Jeremiah

Me - for bashing Sammy last week

Me - for tormenting poor Colton and Alex... WHO'S YOUR DADDY?!?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Oh, it was so worth it!!!

Bad Sports - See me

Whiny, little bratpunks - I really don't have room to criticize you this week... but you all are still pretty dang annoying!

Thieves - as low as I might have sunk this week, you all will always be infinitely lower. Do us a favor: quit breathing! You're all a waste of oxygen. Why don't you save it for those of us who actually matter?

Comments, suggestions, death threats? Send them to BigSpooky1@hotmail.com. Please do not send me offers to trade cards... I don't have that many good extras, and the ones I do are in high enough demand here in Oklahoma.

I'm also available for online duels in Pojo's Yu-Gi-Oh! Duelist League. E-mail me if you would like to duel sometime. Non-ladder duels only please... those ladder duelists are way too uptight.

If you e-mail me in the next few weeks, I may not get back to you for a while. It's not that I don't want to talk with you or duel. I'm in the process of studying for a VERY DIFFICULT certification exam, and these next few weeks will be devoted primarily to studying. In fact, you probably won't see any tournament reports from me for the next few weeks, either (which is why I supersized this one... to satisfy your Killer Squirrel cravings!)