Hyper Spastic Beatdown


Time: Noon (or quarter after it)

Place: All About Sports, Winston-Salem NC

Entrance Fee: $7.00

Entrants: 31

Prizes: First- 6 packs

Second- 4 packs

Third- 2 packs

1 pack for entering

I can’t believe anybody is still reading this…any ways, this is entry #4 in this tourney that I have posted. There were two others between the last one I posted and this one, I just never got around to typing it up. Boo hoo. Let us begin shall we? This is the Hyper Spastic Beatdown as of now. I removed two Books of Moon for a Spirit Reaper. I chucked several other cards…well just look at it.

Monsters (19):

1x Jinzo (I control everything you do. Sorry, no surprises)

1x Guardian Sphinx (Meow…Meow…MEOW <bounce>)

1x Spell Canceller (He owns you, your brother, and your mother)

1x Goblin Attack force (Dropped it to one. Thinking about dropping them all)

1x Skilled Dark Magician (Ka-Smack! Ow, that hurt…)

1x Luster Dragon (Love it…love it…)

2x Spear Dragon (Oh my! Scapegoat Shish-ka-bob!)

1x Breaker the Magical Warrior (You touch-a my pudding, I break-a your-a trap)

1x Tribe-Infecting Virus (Flem to the extreme)

1x Witch of the Black Forest (This little lady rocks)

1x Exiled Force (Burn, baby, burn)

1x Dol-Dora (Never call it Twin-Headed Behemoth again…)

1x Snagan (Fuzzball cubed)

1x Cyber Jar (Bweeee…)

1x Fiber Jar (Isn’t this the sort of things environmetalists use?)

1x Spirit Reaper (Behold my impenetrable wall of rotting flesh!)

1x Sinister Serpent ("Sin" is in. Here after refered to as Sin. Don’t like it? Tough.)

Magic (14):

1x Raigeki (Urg…Sorry, out of little coments)

1x Dark Hole (Nope, still can’t think of any…)

1x Harpie’s Feather Duster (THINK, THINK!!!)

1x Heavy Storm (<Rams head relentlessly against screen.>)

1x Change of Heart (<Screen breaks, embedding in head>)

1x Monster Reborn (AHHHHH!!! MY BRAIN!!!)

1x Pot of Greed (<Loses conciousness>)

1x Graceful Charity (<Annoying little kid starts poking me>)

1x Book of Moon (<Eye snaps open. Strangles kid. Kid runs off>)

2x Mystical Space Typhoon (Boy, that got the blood running…)

1x Snatch Steal (MINE!!!)

1x Premature Burial (Gimmie that back.)

1x United we Stand (Tried it without it. Just didn’t work)

Traps (7):

1x Ring of Destruction (With this ring I do de-wed…I mean destroy. Yeah, that’s right)

1x Magic Cylinders (Obsolete?!? Never!!!)

1x Mirror Force (I believe it is time to…reflect)

1x Imperial Order (Access…DENIED!)

1x Call of the Haunted (Ohhhh…spooky)

1x Nightmare Wheel (A little snug, are we?)

1x Mirror Wall (Nope, sorry. You are NOT going to smush my Canceller)

And that is that. Whew. Took longer than usual to get there a la the stupid traffic and crap. I didn’t take Jill this week because I heard that Lain (or Lane, not sure which. FORGIVE ME!!) was going to take her, so it was just me and my annoying little brother. I got there, though, and Jill wasn’t there, but Lain (Lane) was. Apparentlly, she waqs sick, so couldn’t go. She was even sick over Thanksgiving. Poor Jill. Kinda put a damper on the rest of the day. Anyway, there was also some of my friends from school who were there. Unfortunetly, Justin and Robert weren’t there…only challenges there were the two Chrises, J-Hon and Tiras. Oh well, better for me. First round, I faced Eric. Hadnm’t really played him before, so I went in all cautious like.

Round 1- Hyper Spastic Beatdown vs. Eric

First duel was awfully quick. He tried to stall a little with Messamger of Peace and Gravity Bind, along with some Momongas, but Jinzo and Sphinx eventually just owned his @$$.

Next game, was simmilar to the first, but this time, I kept burning the monsters he threw down with Exiled Force and returning it with my multitudes of recursion, then slipping under Messanger of Peace with a Reaper. I eventually plugged his Peace with a Duster and layed the smack down with Spear and United. Smack-el.


My little brother lost by a De-Fusioned Dark Paladin (oh, that must sting.) J-Hon got himself beaten by one of my buddies from school and his neat little Water deck. I played him for fun once, and right in the middle of it, this chubby old hag sitting on a stool she looked like she was sucking into her enourmous @$$ said "Do you want to keep your mouth? Then don’t say that again." I won’t say what I said for her to say that to me (which is, ironically enough, the same thing I called her after she told me off). Chris and Tiras advanced. Next round, I had a guy named Jason, who I hadn’t seen before. My two buddies from school faced up against each other. Next round, begin!

Round 2- Hyper Spastic Beatdown vs. Jason

First game was simple. I klayed Sangan in deffense, but he crossed it out, layed like three others face-down and attacked direct with Momonga (why is everybody suddenly playing those?). I Dusted. He cursed. He cried. We moved on. I Holed. He cried. We moved on. I summoned Luster. I plugged him. He cried. We moved on. It bacically went on like that for a while, me having complete ownage over him with Sphinx. He Change of Hearted it late game, and flipped. Then he flip summoned his Right Leg of Exodia (WHA!!!) and kicked me with it. I laughed, then Magic Cylindered it. He Seven Tooled it. Hey, it’s all good. Next turn I won.

He was kind enough to let me go first again, so I set Sin and ended. He Change of Hearted it and flipped it. Then he layed like four more face-down and attacked with Sin, setting a monster. Then I Stormed them all away. Yeah, I think he really shouldn’t play all those down at once. It is dangerous to your health. I left my Sin in defense then set Sangan. His move He burned my two little buddies for the Lava Golem. Then he played Swords. Stupid piece of…. Luckily, next turn I drew Imperial Order and set it. Then I ended. He set, my move. I Raigekied and activated the Oder…I mean Order and plugged him direct for 3000. Rule #1: NEVER let a Lava Golem attack. It hurts. And that my friends, pretty much ended it.

Winner –Me

Josh, one of my buds from school, advanced, but was fated to lose. He was forced to face Tiras next. I know it was mean, but I just had to yell out "Sweet dreams Joshey boy!" Oh, it was classic. Chris also advanced, but got a bye. Oh well. I got faced-up against Ash, I mean Chris, Ketchum, a Fiend and Dark lover.

Round 3- Hyper Spastic Beatdown vs. Chris

First Round he owned from early. He had me at 300 three turns into the thing, and I stayed there forever. My Sphinx held out for a good many turns, and before that my Spirit Reaper did a good job of holding down the fort. About half way through, Lain (Lane) came up to me with her phone. Jill wanted to talk to me. She sounded really sickly. I decided I would bring her something after the tourney. Pour girl. I felt really bad for her. Anyway, back to the match. I thought I had him, but it ended up being a tie, a la Ring of Destruction.

Second Round, I got Sphinx out early, but then he Ringed it the turn after it hit the field. So, I Prematured it back, and REALLY pissed him off. He just couldn’t deal with the might of my deadly Kitty-witty-schnookiekins. Meow!

Third round was a little insane. Early on, I searched for Fiber Jar with Sangan, and kept faking him out with it. He never summoned another monster before attacking to safeguard himself. He eventually got two monster on the field, but I just Magic Cylindered the other one. But, when I finally set Fiber Jar, he Ceasefired. The little monster. We bounced attacks back and forth between his Opticlops and…his Opticlops (Monster Reborned it). Eventually, it got down to me with only a Spell Canceller and him with one dude in defense. I Nightmare Wheeled it the turn before, so he sacrificed it to the Dark Ruler, Hagen-Daz!!! (For those of you who don’t know, that is Dark Ruler Ha Des). He attacked…and had a little moment of reflection. Mirror Wall was like, "Ha!! I win, you suck!!!." So my Canceller lived, and he was screwed from there. Oh yeah. He was tough though. I’ll give him that.


Tiras thrashed Josh mercilessly, and we drew for the bye to the final round. I got it, so it was all good. It was rather boring though. I can’t even remember what I did between rounds…oh well. All that matters is that Tiras lost and chris won. So the finals were me against Chris. Woo-Hoo!!!

Finals- Hyper Spastic Beatdown vs. Chris

First round was pretty sad. He whupped me all over the place like I was a bag of grass. Jinzo locked me down while I had Imperial Order, Magic Cylinders, and Mirror Force all face-down. Then he pulled Lily out and stabbed me horribly. Ouch.

Second round was almost identical. The only difference was I delt him some damage with my Wheel. Only like 1000 though, so it didn’t help. Again, Lily and Jinzo crushed me. What are the odds? Obviously pretty good. What really tweaks me though is that my next friggin card was Raigeki. Oh well, this guy deserved to win. He hadn’t won yet in the whole time he had come to All About Sports. And he was a regular for almost every week. He deserved it.


So I got second. Oh well, second isn’t that bad. I pulled shizoola out of my packs. Oh well. We went over to Burger King afterwards, and I played Chris a couple times. I ended up losing six times in a row. Then I played J-Hon and won a Nightmare Wheel and Banisher of the Light off him. Oh well, it ended up all good in the end. Then we left and went to Barnes and Noble for some books. I grabbed the first volume of Trigun for myself, and tried to find volume one of Chobits as well, but they only had #2 through #5. Figures. As luck would have it, too, I was going to get Demon Diaries #4 fior Jill as a get well present, but they didn’t have. Poo. So I looked for volume 2 of the Class Detectives by Clamp, and still couldn’t find it. Just keeps getting better, aye? So I felt really bad about not getting Jill anything. Erg. Any who, time for the good, the bad, and the ugly.

The Good-

-Getting Second. Come on, this has got to be a good sign!

-Essentially getting a Drop Off, a Scapegoat, a Ceasfire, and a Nightmare Wheel for a Yata-Garasu. I wasn’t using it or planning to use it anyway so it is all good.

-Getting volume one of Trigun. Alright.

-Getting the first volume of the FLCL Manga. ROCK ON HARUKO!!!!

-Finding the best site for Anime/Video Game music download on the web. If you want it, just email me.

The Bad-

-Jill being sick. I hope she gets better…

-Barnes and Noble not having three-quarters of the manga I wanted.

-Not being able to find the Chobits Anime videos. I need them as a Christmas present for someone, plus I want to watch them myself!!

The Ugly-

-Chris beating me so much. Erg. Darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn

darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn darn…

-Thieves. Yes I am still on you guys. I am going to exterminate every last one of you, I swear it…

If you need to catch me, swing by and leave me a letter or something. Come on, please? I get lonely…I will be at kappasinmyhead@hotmail.com. I read everything that comes in to the inbox. And I reply to them too. So don’t be afraid…come on down.