From: Damien Smith [smith_damien88@hotmail.com] Strife's Top Ten cards that people laugh at you for playing Hey, wuzzup. I'm back and ready to go my third time around. Today, I will be focusing on cards that should NEVER see the light of table. They shouldn't even be used by a 5-year old newbie against the world champ! Whatever UD thought when they made these cards, I'd bet they were smoking. ANYhoo - 10. Two-Pronged attack - Trap - Select and destroy two of your own monsters and one of your opponents monsters. ...what the frig? What is this? Who in the world made this piece of garbage card?!? Why would you want to sacrifice TWO monsters to destroy ONE of theirs??? This is one of the most retarted pieces of garbage I have ever seen! (hence the list) 9. Jirai Gumo - level 4 / Earth / Insect / 2200 attack 100 defense - When you attack with this card, toss a coin and call it. If you call it right, attack normally. If you call it wrong, reduce your life points by half before attacking. Oh no. No. NO. NO NO NO!!! The way I see it, if your going to pay a big cost, you had better get a good effect. Examples would be solemn judgement, Injection Fairy Lilly or Imperial Order for a few turns. But attacking once with this could easily cost you half your life points? Why? I would run an 1800 beatstick over this. Losing that many lifepoints for one attack just to suicide an orc... no no no. 8. White Hole/Anti-Rageiki/Gryphon Wing - All traps - Turn the effect of (Dark Hole/Rageiki/Harpies Feather Duster [respectively]) back on your opponent. Oh my...not these. These things haunt my nightmares with their stupidity. These are some of the most useless cards in yugioh. come on! Even though most duelists run these, the chance that they will use it at the same time you have your trap face down are literally 80 to 1. BAD ODDS!!! 7. Gryphons Feather Duster - Normal Spell - Destroy all Spells/Traps on your side of the field. Gain 500 life points for each cards destroyed. ...Huh? What is the point of destroying your valuable Spells/Traps just to gain measly life points for each one? This doesn't even count itself, meaning you have to destroy your other cards for it's effect to work. Ever heard of emergency provisions? The same effect, only you gain 1000 each. Much better, people! What a junk card this is... 6. Thunder Crash - Spell - Destroy all monsters on your side of the field. Inflict damage to your opponent's Life Points equal to the number of monsters destroyed x 300 points. ...................WHAT!?!?!?!?! WHY TF WOULD YOU GIVE YOUR OPPONENT A FREE FRIGGIN RAGEIKI TO DO 300 FRIGGIN DAMAGE PER MONSTER? THAT'S FRIGGIN STUPID!!! -whew- must calm down... ok, this may be the worst spell card i have ever seen. ever. EVER. ever! EVER! E! V! E! R! I! N! M! Y! L! I! F! E! 5. Beaver Warrior - level 4 / Earth / Beast Warrior / 1200 attack 1500 defense - No effect. rotflmho x593785!!! What the heck? What in the world is a 12-hundred attack level FOUR going to do for you? It can attack under MoP or something?? JEEZ. 4. Red Eyes Black Metal Dragon - level 8 / Dark / Machine / 2800 attack 2400 defense - This card can only be Special Summoned from the Deck to the field by offering "Red-Eyes B. Dragon" equipped with "Metalmorph" as a Tribute. Your Deck is then shuffled. NOOOO!!!!!! How DARE those scumbags do this to such an amazing trap card? What were they thinking!??!? AAAAAAHHHH!!! okay, first you have to get a 2-sac 2400 attacker on the field, equip it with a metalmorph, and hope it survives until your next turn. And after that, you better hope you don't draw this, because it can't be special-summoned from your hand!!! This is so frigging retarted...I HATE YOU RED-EYES!!! 3. Red-Eyes Black Dragon - level 7 / Dark / Dragon / 2400 attack 2000 defense - no effect. GrRrRrRrRRRRR!!!!!! The second coolest-looking dragon in the TCG and it's absolutely Pathetic! While Jinzo the 6-star 2400 trap-killer, Tyrant Dragon the 8 star 2900 attack double-attacking specific trap negating destroyer and even the 6-star frekin summoned SKULL are running amok causing havok, poor red-eyes had to retire to the shoe-box because of his 7th level. This is freakin CRUELTY TO COOL ANIMALS!!! 2. Harpies Pet Dragon - level 7 / Wind / Dragon / 2000 attack 2500 defense - Increase the ATK and DEF of this card by 300 points for each face-up "Harpie Lady" on the field. What the frig. This could be and is worse then the red-eyes black Dragon. NOBODY RUNS HARPIE LADIES except as a FUN DECK. They're GARBAGE!!! And this thing is way worse. Okay, here we go to number 1...it's doubtful any of you remember this guy back from good ol' metal raiders... 1. Morinphen - level 5 / Dark / Fiend / 1550 attack 1300 defense - You must pay 13 (yes 13, not 1300) life points at each standbay phase. Each and every main phase, your opponent takes 4000 points of direct damage to their life points. Not really, Morinphen has no effect. A level 5(one sacrifice), 1550 attack monster with no effect. ................. -sits down and cries uncontrollably for 2 hours- Words can't even describe how useless this thing is. I'm not even going to try. If you can't see what's wrong with a 1550 level 5, you deserve to be shot. Don't argue, just go get a pistol, and shoot yourself. end it before you get any more stupid. (don't really) ok, so if you didn't like it, then sorry for wasting your life go away. If you liked it, feel free to email me at smith_damien88@hotmail.com. Don't send any attachments though, I wont open any more of those due to the fact that someone tried to infect my computer with an incurable virus today. By the way...Whoever that was? I sent you an e-mail........ \ / 0 0 \___/ \__/