Pojo's Magic The Gathering news, tips, strategies and more!

Pojo's MTG
MTG Home
Message Board
News & Archives
Deck Garage
BMoor Dolf BeJoSe

Columnists
Paul's Perspective
Jeff Zandi
DeQuan Watson
Jordon Kronick
IQ
Aburame Shino
Rare Hunter
Tim Stoltzfus
WiCkEd
Judge Bill's Corner


Trading Card
Game

Card of the Day
Guide for Newbies
Decks to Beat
Featured Articles
Peasant Magic
Fan Tips
Tourney Reports


Other
Color Chart
Book Reviews
Online Play
MTG Links
Staff




Peasant Magic Decks

'Slip and Slide' – by Vlatko Jurisic
12.15.05

I present to you, well...this. But hey, at least it’s Peasant legal.
 
CLEVELAND, ARE YOU READY TO ROCK!
 
*Lead vocals: 1 Vulshok Berserker (Korn’s Jonathan Davis. If you ain’t playin’ PEZ, use Eron the Relentless (a.k.a Axel Rose) instead.)
Backup singers: 1 Elvish Impersonators
Guitar: 1 Phyrexian Reaper (James Hetfield)
Second guitar: 1 Gruul Scrapper (Since I couldn’t think of a card to represent Tom Morello, we’ll have to go with the Zach De La Rocha look alike instead.
Bass guitar: 1 Devout Harpist (Paz Lenchantin.)
Drums: 1 Deepwood Drummer (Mickey Hart.)
Opening Act: 1 Clam Session (The Bad Plus. All of ‘em.)
 
Fans and groupies:
1 Little Girl
1 Kris Mage (Mmmm, blondes...)
1 Deadhead
1 Red Hot Hottie (Mmmm, stacked....)
1 Mogg Fanatic
1 Cuombajj Witches (Mmmm, twins...)
 
Support Staff:
2 Standing Army (for security.)
2 Spineless Thug and 3 Thallids (all of whom are roadies.)
 
The show:
4 Land Aid ‘04 (At this point, I feel I need to share a story that a net-friend once told me about a U2 concert. The band is performing "One." The Edge is in the middle of the guitar solo when Bono starts clapping his hands in rhythm and says "Every time I clap, a child in Africa dies," at which point some wag in the audience screams out "Then stop clapping yer f%#^ing hands!" True story, maybe.)
1 Sex Appeal
1 Pyrotechnics (Part of the stage show.)
2 Number Crunch (The accountants are frustrated. "Who’s going to pay for all of this?")
*1 Urza’s Hot Tub (for the afterparty. Hello ladies!)
2 Lava Axe (for Paz and Zach. Hetfield brought his own. (Those of you who’ve never seen the illustration for Phyrexian Reaper won’t get that.)
2 Scorching Missile (more pyrotechnics)
3 Awol ("And I needed to find 500 brown M&M’s to fill a brandy glass or else Ozzy wouldn’t go onstage...")
 
On the road:
*4 Rhystic Caves
7 Forests
3 Swamps
4 Plains
4 Mountains
2 Izzet Boilerworks
 
Don’t blame me. I just produce their records. ;)

 

 

 

 

Copyrightę 1998-2007 pojo.com
This site is not sponsored, endorsed, or otherwise affiliated with any of the companies or products featured on this site. This is not an Official Site.