Squee & Darigaaz
by Miguel Caron
After numerous E-Mails and requests in the M:TG Chatroom... I've decided the next person to have a biography done upon them is none other than Squee, the most annoying character known in the history of the series! ^^ This Biography is a little off from the others as I will be talking about things that are thought about Squee and the controversy about his immortality. Along with Squee, Darigaaz and the other Invasion dragons will be biographed.
While much of Squee's origins are unknown, he firsts appears aboard the Weatherlight as a crewman working as a cabin boy (or goblin..), tending to the cleaning and cooking aboard the mighty vessels for the warriors within.
Being a constant nuisance for the crewman, particularly the humanoid cat warrior Mirri and the disgruntled minotaur Tahngarth, he was deemed useless and incoherent, his speech usually making no sense whatsoever, rambling on and on, not to mentioned being slurred. Upon the Weatherlight's escape from the plane of Rath to Mercadia, the local residents proclaimed him a nabob (The Persian equivalent to a lord) . Much to the bewilderment of the crew of the Weatherlight, it appears that on the plane of Mercadia, every single goblin is considered royalty for some odd reason... this excludes the brutish Moggs of Rath however. This lasted only so long as Squee remained in Mercadia, once the Weatherlight planeshifted to Dominaria, Squee returned to his job sweeping the floors and cooking the meals aboard the Skyship. During the invasion of the Phyrexians upon Dominaria, Squee was given the duty of manning the tail gun of the Weatherlight, something that he proved he was adept and useful to the crew, as he was able to shoot down Phyrexian craft one after another. This proved a great accomplishment for the goblin, that was until he was tossed upon the Predator and slaughtered by Greven il-Vec without the Vec even having to break sweat. Unknown to the Dreadlord, Squee rose from his death, perfectly intact. Carried into the stronghold by the savages under Crovax's control, he is present before Gerrard and Yawgmoth, being used as an example that Yawgmoth can raise the dead. With less than a thought, Yawgmoth slaughters Squee mercilessly. Then, to attempt to prove to Gerrard of his abilities, Yawgmoth raises the fallen goblin. To this day, it is still argued between Storyline Oracle enthusiasts if Squee's revival at this point was because of Yawgmoth, or Squee's own inborn ability to rise from the dead. After this event, Crovax, merely for his own sick dementia of pleasure and amusement, kills the goblin once more. Once again, Squee returns to life as if nothing occurred. The devious pestilence soon forges a small allied resource with the Moggs of the stronghold, and the Moggs, as well as Squee himself, attack Ertai. Ertai gives no second thought as he easily destroys the Moggs and kills Squee once more for the fourth time in one book. Nonetheless, it is obvious that the goblin revives himself once more after this event.
Because of his bizarre to ability to die, or at least to remain dead, Squee has been argued between storyline readers until they turn red and blue, the subject: that Squee, the annoying freak of nature, the one with the inability to die, is actually a Planeswalker, although the goblin probably doesn't realize it. This has caused a lot of heated discussion, the fact that he's apparently immortal from all standards and the fact he has saved the crew of the Weatherlight from perilous situations miraculously seem to point to the ascension to Planeswalkerhood. Skeptics point out, and argue just as strongly that this idea is absurd and idiotic. Only time, and the writers of Wizards of the Coast, will tell.
One of the five Demigod Dragons, Darigaaz was born of fire, more powerful than anything anyone had ever seen. He soon broke the chains that bound his brethren... freeing Rith from the grove that held him, the Treefolk that held him powerless to do anything about it... Crosis was freed some time after... from the catacombs that encased him. Treva and Dromar followed in suit. The demigods were cruel and unstoppable, attacking both forces, Darigaaz being influenced by the advice of Tevesh Szat... his thoughts clouded with evil, all of the mortal dragons captured and enslaved by the tyrannical fire breathers.
Upon the attack the dragons made towards the Weatherlight, the golem Karn touched Darigaaz, instilling him with a spark of divinity, making the massive beast remember his past, and how his mother had given her life to protect Dominaria. He soon realized that the demigod dragons were too powerful to be defeated in combat, all five of them alive made each one more and more powerful than what they would have normally have been. Knowing that there was only one choice, in order to weaken the other dragons, Darigaaz plunged himself into a volcano, being killed by the malicious magma. Because of his death, the other dragons were considerably weakened, returning from Rith's grove, Nemeta as well as other Treefolk managed to capture Rith once more in his eternal prison. Crosis was forced into his catacombs once more by the Weatherlight, and finally, Treva and Dromar, the three others having been vanquished, lost their grip on the enslaving of the mortal dragons, the dragons tearing free and slaughtering Dromar and Treva with their fury.