Hey, welcome to the festivities!! Put on a hat! Here, have a noisemaker!!
Grab some cake and punch!!
Today is my secretary's 6th birthday!! No, I'm not in the practice of
hiring first-graders to do my officework. Remember, today is February 29th,
Leap Day. By conventional standards, you or I would be 24, were we born in
1976 like her. But due to her incredible luck, she is blessed to be forever
young. And as oversensitive as she is about most matters, her age is one of
her happy thoughts. Of course, it could be said that she looks pretty dang
old for a 6-year old, but I value MY life, and I trust so do you yours.
But there is a party going on here today. My venus flytraps are wearing
their shiny party hats, and Hypno has been having a royal blast with the
party horn I gave him this morning. The fish seem overly active, and even
the nosy window washer stopped by, from the outside, to wish my secretary a
Of course, I still bear a responsibility to my patients, party or not.
And you appear to have more pressing concerns than whether you want
chocolate or yellow cake. So let us go to the inner office and fix what ails
> Dear mechanic,
> Hey! I was just wondering if you could give me little help with my
>deck. I think my deck is very well and I can win a lot of games with it.
>problem is if I don't get out the right Pokemon I have a hard time winning.
>also need some work on my trainers. I base my deck on attacking quick with
>some "good" basic Pokemon while I build up my huge poisoners on my bench.
>Let's see what you can do...
>19 Grass Energy
>4 Nidoran (male)
>2 Pokemon Trader
>3 Full Heal
>3 Prof. Oak
>3 Super Energy Removal
>3 Energy Removal
> I am open to any suggestions. I would really appreciate if you could
>me out. Thank you!
Well Chris, to be honest I don't see all that many poison decks. It's a
theme that really hasn't been perfected. Poison is a nice bonus to attacks,
but truthfully, I find that attacks which poison are unusually weak to begin
with. If I was to use a poison deck, I'd certainly have to include Nidoking,
which I am pleased to see you've done.
Of your Pokemon, I can certainly see room for improvement.
The Scythers are a perfect fit. They hit hard and can take some good hits
too. Having 4 in your deck could not hurt in any way. Add one more.
Your Grimer/Muk ratio is just fine. Leave that be.
So is the Nidoking family. Don't touch them either.
I'm a bit hesitant about the Gloom and Oddish part. Neither seems terribly
powerful for what you give. Still, there are far worse Grass poisoners out
there. Unfortunately, you have more Pokemon than is necessary, so I'm going
to remove this weak-link family.
Add 2 more Pinsirs to give yourself more breathing room with Psychic
creatures. The Nido and Grimer families are both weak to Psychic. While
Pinsir is not resistant, it can paralyze and deal 50 painful points of
damage to a Mewtwo without looking back.
Now that we've cleaned up your Pokemon problems, we can smooth over the
Trainers. Here, let me freshen your punch while I explain.
With the removal of the Oddishes and the Glooms, you no longer have any
need for those Full Heals. While handy, they are only an emergency measure.
Give up on them and deal yourself 3 Bills instead. Bill is much more useful
than any old Full Heal, anyday.
Professor Oak is an excellent card, in moderation. If used too much,
you'll deck yourself in no time flat. 3 is approaching that level. You can
safely get by with just two and never miss a thing. And with the space
created, you can give yourself another Bill, so you still get some card
drawing power. Cool!
Pokemon Trader is a sensible addition to this deck. The 2 you have will
be plenty. I've warmed up to this card since there is no discard of anything
you may really need.
Energy Removal, while a great strategy, really takes up the place where
other Trainers should be. It would be in your best interest to replace the 3
Energy Removals with Switches. Nidoking has a hefty retreat cost and Muk and
Pinsir ain't exactly free either.
The Super Energy Removals should be taken out for a Computer Search and
2 Item Finders. These are such versatile cards, that you can't afford to not
play with them.
Grass Pokemon are a tad expensive when it comes to Energy costs, so I'd
push your Energy count up to 4 Double Colorless Energy and 21 Grass Energy.
Hey, I see I've got a visitor. Dr. Finkelbaum D.D.S. from nextdoor has
dropped by. He could probably smell the cake, as if he needs it. I'm pretty
sure dentists stress avoiding sugary snacks. I should see what he wants.
Hey Doctor, what's up? A gift for my secretary? No, go right ahead. I'm
sure she'd love to stop doing her work to indulge in any side activity you
provide. Just kidding. Go on. I'm dying to see what a dentist gives as
Oh wow, an etched portrait you did of her on scrimshaw. How magnificent.
How wonderfully, monumentally, magnificent. Kind of puts the vanity case I
got her to real shame. I'm going to go hide back in my office now. Besides,
I'm sure my patient would like to see how his revised deck should look.
You do want to see don't you?? Well here goes:
4 Nidoran males
2 Professor Oaks
2 Pokemon Traders
2 Item Finders
1 Computer Search
21 Grass Energy
4 Double Colorless Energy
Ok, this deck is looking more solid than it's predecessor. The poison
attacks are intact, but with some better attacks and defensive capabilities.
Keep away from strong Psychic attackers, especially with Nidoking, and
you'll do all right.
I pronounce you cured. Pay my secretary on your way out, wish her a
happy birthday, take some more cake and be about your merry way.
I'm getting thirsty. Time for a refill on my punch. This stuff has more
sugar than Jolt, I swear. Umm....where did all these crystals come from??
The New Age clinic on the 3rd floor? They brought you all these?? For what?
Oh. Yeah I understand. Your karma needs all the help it can get.
Well, I still have a lot of patients to deal with today. So it's
business as usual for me. Still, there is one birthday ritual that hasn't
been done yet.
No I'd better not. You'll probably sue me for harassment if I give
your birthday spanking huh?
Dr. Crash Landon
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