Ever heard of Murphy's Law? "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong."
Well, Murphy must have been the midnight janitor, because he's left his
curse on my office today. And what a mess it's caused...

     When I arrived, I found my secretary perched awkwardly by the fish tank
with her finger on the corner and a visible sigh upon her forehead. The tank
had sprung a leak while she was cleaning the glass and she couldn't leave it
to do anything else because we just had the carpets cleaned. So I had to
leave her looking like Hans Brinker while I ran to the drugstore for some
duct tape.
     When I returned I found that my secretary had solved some of the
problem by transferring all the fish into the water cooler. Yeah it's funny
and they're happy and all, but I sure am thirsty.
     And then we found out the answering machine had broken as well. This
was revealed by the streaming ribbon of cassette tape that shot forth when I
hit play. It was fun walking wrapping the spaghetti around my arms and
yelling "Aaaargh...the mummy rises once more!". . .until I tripped on the
tape and bruised my elbow.
     I spilt coffee on the rug, (gotta call the cleaners again after all) a
deliveryman for the chiropractor nextdoor accidentally slipped and hurled a
swivel stool through the glass in my office door, plus I left my wallet on
the kitchen table, so no lunch for me.

    My secretary is thinking about taking up voodoo to appease the spirits
that have cursed this place so. But I guess everyone has problems, or else
you wouldn't be here. If you're feeling lucky, you can step into my office
and tell me what your trouble is. You go first.
>hey crash -
>I'm fairly new to pokemon, but I think i've got a pretty good deck here. 
>It's an all-grass poison deck, and it's pretty annoying to play against:
>21 Pokemon
>3 Ekans
>2 Arbok
>3 Bulbasaur
>2 Ivysaur
>1 Venusaur
>3 Koffing
>2 Weezing
>3 Grimer
>2 Muk
>24 Grass Energy
>15 Trainers
>2 Potion
>1 Super Potion
>2 Energy Removal
>1 Super Energy Removal
>2 Bill
>2 Professor Oak
>2 Switch
>2 Gust of Wind
>1 Devolution Spray (get rid of Muk to use Venusaur)
>My strategy with this deck is pretty simple.  Just keep the opponent
>occupied with Foul Gas, Nasty Goo, and Wrap until I get out the big guns. 
>Muk's power is extremely helpful vs. Rain Dance and other such archetypes,
>as well as Dittos (not to mention his sweet attack).  Venusaur's power
>rocks and is quite helpful, although it usually just adds insult to injury
>for my opponent.
>I really want to improve this deck though because I've never tried it at a
>tournament, and it would get massacred by Haymakers and psychic decks. 
>Plus, the fact that there's no resistances doesn't really help me much. 
>I'd appreciate any suggestions you've got.
       -You really like Grass I take it. So do I. Some of the best Pokemon
in the game right now are Grass types. The major problem with this deck is
the fact that Muk and Venusaur are at odds with themselves. It's like you
want to have your cake and eat it too. And no one of those powers is better
than the other. Energy Trans is a killer strategy when playing Grass, but
Toxic Gas is essential to the metagame. Well leave Muk and Venusaur alone. .
.for now.
        The other Grass Pokemon are all right, but could be better. The
Ekans/Arbok family can leave. You're not going to lose much by tossing them.
Plus they have lousy HP values.
        Koffing/Weezing is also a qestionable one. Koffing is very good
early on since his attacks are guaranteed to cause one status effect or
another, but Weezing is relatively mediocre and you really don't want to be
blowing up your own bench too.
        I'd suggest adding 4 Scythers definitely. They are basic, have a
vital resistance to Fighting types and do massive damage with Grass Energy
attached if you can spare the charge up time. Plus no retreat cost is always
worth it's weight in gold.
        Also worth including are Pinsirs. It's attacks are costly, but
deadly. The cost of the attack shouldn't bother you much though since this
is a mono-color deck and Double Colorless Energy can go a great way to help.
Be wary of it's slightly lower HP.

         Say, what's going on outside? There's an odd whooshing noise..I'm
gonna check this out.
          Well, well. You had to tempt fate by making some copies huh?
Serves you right. You knew the risks today, and now the machine is spitting
paper nonstop at you. Well, don't just stare at me with that evil face, push
the stop button. Well push it again, harder!! I dunno, did you set the
toner? Maybe it's mad. Wow, I had no idea it held this much paper...Try
unplugging it! It shocked you...hmmmm...No I don't know any good exorcists.
Look, I'm gonna go hide in my office and leave this to you. You're the more
technical minded one. You're what?...beats me. I never had to find one. Try
the Yellow Pages under "C" for Church. Have fun.

          Some days it don't pay to get up. I WAS going to discuss your
Trainers until someone out there had to rile up destiny's wrath.
           Ok, your Trainers were all right. It's mostly a case of more of
some, less of others. I'd lose the potions altogether. They're sorta nice,
but not the cards that win games. The Switches can go and toss that
Deevolution Spray completely. If you can play smart, you will not need it.
And even if you play dumb, you still shouldn't have too much use for it.
Pokemon Traders will make a difference in this deck, so include several.
Also, 2 Mr. Fujis will allow you more freedom in your strategy. If Muk is
cramping your style, use Fuji to simply put him back into your deck. This
gives you some extra time against Stall decks as well.
         Add more Bills, and most definitely 2 more Gusts of Wind. A
Computer Search and an Item Finder will round out this set nicely.

         Let's pray that lightning doesn't strike us, knock on some wood and
see how your deck should look with some revision.

         4 Bulbasaurs
         3 Ivysaurs
         2 Venusaurs
         3 Grimers
         2 Muks
         4 Scythers
         2 Pinsirs

         4 Bills
         2 Professor Oaks
         4 Gusts of Wind
         1 Computer Search
         1 Item Finder
         2 Pokemon Traders
         2 Mr. Fujis

         4 Double Colorless Energy
         20 Grass Energy

     That's it for the actual contents. I'm going to give you some advice on
a good strategy.
     Venusaur is a powerful help on your bench. He can help recover from a
Super Energy Removal instantly. He's great to allow retreating. But Muk
seriously hurts him.
     On the other hand, Damage Swap and Raindance decks can put a hurt on
you if unstopped. Muk is the ultimate defense against them.
     What you'll want to do is play all your other creatures EXCEPT Muk. You
can place a Grimer out, just beware that he may become Gusted into action.
If the deck you are using relies on Blastoise, Alakazam, Ditto, or Gengar
etc. play Muk when it won't hurt you much and watch your opponent cringe.
      If your opponent is playing a Haymaker or Bench Press deck, keep Muk
in your hand. You'll need Venusaur more to defend against energy Removals.
Instead use the Muk with the Computer Search, Item Finder or Pokemon Trader
for something better.
      So hold off with the Muk until you're sure if you need him or not.
He's kind of like...insurance. Just always be sure to leave room on your
bench until you are certain.
     This deck is only really weak against Fire types, but thankfully they
aren't that common on the tournament scene right now. Friendly play may have
more, but you're not losing anything there.

      I hope you have more success with this version. I kept it all Grass as
the title implied. If there are any further problems, make another
appointment, and I'll figure something out. You may now pay my secretary and
then try to make a speedy exit before something falls from the sky and
squashes you flat.

      I should probably put some duct tape on the door too..Oh hello Father!
(She actually called!) No we haven't actually SEEN any spirits, but the
copier went nuts and I think the coffee tasted a little funny. I'm sure it's
just a run of bad luck and not anything supernatur...what's that? Why is it
smoking? Please quit chanting...I'm trying to run a business..you'll scare
my clients away, more than usually happens. I know what you're saying. I
took Latin. Hey! Stay away from my bookends! There are no foul demons in my
bookends!! Please tell your assistant to stop splashing water on everything.
That's a Corinthian leather couch, it will warp.
      I need a seat...my head is spinning...No!! That's not what I meant!!
Stay away! It's a figure of speech! Help!

                  Good Luck, (to me too)

                     Dr. Crash Landon
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